Sister remembers Sept. 11 victim Alan Lederman
Alan Lederman and Roni Salkin
Treasured memories and photographs salute
brother’s life
By dave goldberg
Staff Writer
NORTH BRUNSWICK — Alan Lederman was one of thousands lost in the tragic attacks of Sept. 11, but his memory remains treasured by younger sister, Roni Salkin.
"My brother was the cool older brother that everybody wanted, but I had," Salkin said. "My brother loved music, cars, animals, a good joke, family, good beer, his friends, art, travel, nature, computers, reading, movies, science fiction, a good party, his Nikon camera, and good conversations. There really wasn’t much he didn’t like — he didn’t like judgments, prejudice, hatred and evil-— the very things that took him from us."
Lederman, 43, and two others from Aon Corp. on the 92nd floor of the World Trade Center Tower 2 were killed during the attack.
It was very difficult for Salkin to first cope with the tragic events of Sept. 11.
"On the morning of Sept. 11, my brother called me at work and left a message saying that a plane had hit the other tower, but he was OK, and I shouldn’t worry. He would call me later," Salkin said. "I called his cell phone for days nonstop, until the voice mailbox was full. I spent three sleepless days and nights e-mailing and calling, but I knew by Friday that I would never see him again. I finally got in touch with Frank Crystal at his company who sat next to him at Aon who told me the story of the last morning. They knew each other from a past job and were friends," Salkin said."
Salkin said that Lederman was very brave and tried to comfort others when the planes hit the World Trade Center.
"After the plane hit the first tower, one of my brother’s co-workers flipped out. One woman noticed my brother trying to calm this woman down and went up to them to see if she could help. My brother told her to leave, saying he would take care of the other woman."
Salkin continued, "I later spoke to the woman that my brother forced to leave on the phone, and she said that if it weren’t for my brother, she would not have left at that time. My brother stayed behind to make sure that everyone was out and to help two women who were left, one woman who was freaking out and another nervous woman. My brother and the two women are the only ones missing from their unit at Aon on the 92nd floor of Tower 2."
Salkin remembers how much fun it was to take vacations with her brother, because no matter where they went, he made it fun.
"When I was 16, my parents sent us to Iceland together, just my brother and me," Salkin said. "Who goes to Iceland for vacation? Who even knows anything about it? No one could ever have given me a better present. We explored the land together, ate in foreign eateries, went bar hopping, and had the best time ever. Even if I didn’t go anywhere with Alan, but just got to spend some time alone with him, it was the best time."
Lederman was the kind of person whom everyone wanted to be around, according to Salkin.
"Everyone wanted to be the one to spend time with him — he was just so fun and so interesting," Salkin said. "That same year, my parents gave me a sweet sixteen party, and my brother made sure it was the best party ever. He danced every dance with me and my friends, chose all the music, and joked and laughed with all of my friends who thought he was the most fun brother ever."
Salkin said that she has many happy memories of her brother from her youth.
"I remember when I was little and all my friends were complaining about their older brothers, I wasn’t," Salkin said. "Alan was 8 years older than me and let me go to all his parties and drove me everywhere when he got his license. When he was about 14, my parents got him a little yellow Honda dirt bike, which he rode in the fields behind my parents house in North Brunswick. I cried and cried that I couldn’t go with him and his friends—he finally put me on the back and went super slow until I fell off the back. But it was enough for me that he took the time to include his little sister when he wanted to spend the time with his friends."
Lederman was very dedicated to his family, according to Salkin.
"He never forgot his family. There were four of us; it’s so strange to say were," Salkin said. "My sister, Jean, is the oldest, then there was Alan, then my other brother Andy, then me. My sister shared the same friends as Alan, went to the same parties with him, where he always watched out for her, dated his friends, and listened to whatever music he said was cool. Andy and Alan had the typical brother rivalry since they shared a bedroom for years, but they were always very close. And then there’s me, the family planner, everyone’s little sister."
Salkin also said that Lederman was close with everyone in her family.
"Alan had a special bond with each one of us and, of course, as the first son in the family, he was the apple of my parents’ eyes and could do no wrong," Salkin said, adding that her brother had a streak of mischievousness that led to some amusing incidents.
"My mother loved to tell stories like the one where Alan stepped on a rusty nail to see what would happen, or where he dropped a glass milk bottle onto my mother’s car windshield to see if it would break.
Salkin continued, "Or, when Alan was a baby and my parents took him to a restaurant where he used his spoon to fling his mashed potatoes onto a woman’s fur hat. The first day he got his glasses, he went sledding and went right into a tree, and, of course, lost the glasses."
There were special traditions that Lederman always enjoyed every year, according to Salkin.
"He set off fireworks every summer, and the neighbors always called the police on him and his friends," Salkin said. "I remember one Halloween he took a tire and put shoe polish on it, rolled it on a shirt and bandaged himself up — to look like he was run over by a car. It was really very clever, just like him."
Salkin also said that Lederman took many family vacations.
"We used to take family vacations to Bar Harbor, Maine, and Lake George, New York," Salkin said. "We went to shows, Disneyland, Jamaica, museums, fancy restaurants, and everywhere my parents could afford to take us, always as a family."
Lederman was very gifted and always looked for something new, according to Salkin.
"Alan was so clever and always wanted to be challenged," Salkin said. "He often got reprimanded in school for drawing in his notebooks instead of taking notes. But he always did well, without studying. He noticed everything and knew something about everything, but never showed off."
Salkin also said that he was involved in their parents’ hardware business where he used his talents to help them.
"As he got older, he joined my parents’ hardware business and quickly created catalogs and joked with the all the old hardware store owners all across the country," Salkin said. "He kind of drifted in and out of a few jobs until he started working in the insurance industry about 10 years ago, about the time he met Nancy, his wife."
Once Lederman got a job in New York, the family didn’t get to see him as much, according to Salkin.
"After he moved out of North Brunswick to Manhattan, we didn’t get to see him as much," Salkin said. "There were a few weekends where he would come out to New Jersey and stay at my house with me and my husband. We would stay up ’til all hours of the night just chatting about everything and nothing. Those are some of the times I’m going to miss the most."
Salkin said that the family is now coming to grips now that the remains of her brother have been discovered.
"I just found out, in the last week, that my brother’s remains were found," Salkin said. "I don’t know what was found or how or where or any other details yet, only that the medical examiner identified my brother’s remains. This is a brand-new pain all over again. I hope we can all find some peace soon—as you can imagine, this is a very difficult holiday season for me and my family. There are so many reminders everywhere that the world is not the place it used to be. One consolation I have is that my brother does not have to see the conflict and pain that is consuming so many people."
Many people came to the memorial service to pay their respects to Lederman, according to Salkin.
"We had a memorial service for my brother on Oct. 7. There were hundreds of people mourning — from the old neighborhood, old jobs, relatives, friends of the family," Lederman said. "When we went back to my house to sit shiva, many of his friends told me stories of great times spent with my brother. He was the first one at work every day and the last one to leave. He was always ready to go out for lunch or out for a drink after work. He was the "therapist" and confidant to so many people. I don’t think he would have realized just how many."
The number of people who remembered Lederman was a tribute to how hard he worked to stay in touch with others, according to Salkin.
"He was always keeping in touch with people from past jobs and was always ready with his e-mail broadcasts and jokes," Salkin said. "He only started with Aon on July 9, and it was his dream job. He spent a lot of years trying to figure out just what he wanted to do and where he wanted to be, and he finally reached it this summer. His trip to California, his new job, new friends — he had just about hit where he wanted to be. It takes some people longer than others to find themselves, and he recently found himself. The irony being that he didn’t really get the chance to enjoy his newfound self."