Parenting Pearls: Think carefully before adopting a pet

By: Dr. Mae Sakharov
Anyone that makes a habit of walking around Lambertville and New Hope can see they are pet-friendly places.
During the summer, shop owners provide water lest a precious pet have thirst. People often address a dog or kitty with a bold hello before acknowledging the owner.
Many pet local owners support the of rescue organizations of all kinds and have adopted older animals. One man who combs the streets of New Hope with his little dog describes adopting a 12-year-old to let it live out its last years in peace. Ditto for a couple who brought home an older West Highland terrier after its owner died. Others have gone to the Greyhound rescue or consciously seek to liberate species exploited in puppy mills.
Despite our pet user-friendly atmosphere, it is very important to use caution and not emotion or sympathy when thinking of purchasing a pet. When having a pet of your own is impossible, alternatives exist.
Five years ago, as I walked around the circle in Village II with my feisty Jack Russell terrier and docile black pug, a young girl with a clarinet case smiled as she waited for the school bus. As time went on, she began to pet the dogs as we walked by the bench. This ritual went on for several months as we got to know one another.
I found out Christie Williamson in the seventh grade at the time loved animals but could not have one because her mother had severe allergies. Since that fortuitous moment, she has become my dog walker and sitter when I go on extended trips. I rely on her and know the animals are overjoyed when she brings them little presents either spontaneously or on holidays. One day she will probably have a dog of her own, but until that time, we have arrived at a perfect solution for a person with allergies in the family.
Having any kind of domestic animal is truly a joy but an awesome responsibility as well. Share a pet with a neighbor as Christie and I do rather than make a hasty decision about buying or adopting any kind of pet.
The towpath in Lambertville and the circle at Village II have long been places where animal lovers gather, and their pets get a chance to run and socialize. It is wonderful to see them running after each other, Frisbees and iridescent balls. One devoted animal lover even brought his border collie, Boomer, and a doggie tunnel as a special treat. Another of the more active members of the dog brigade confided he waited until he retired before purchasing his beloved Dalmatian, Roger.
Many such elegantly spotted canines have not fared so well and are on borrowed time at the Humane Society. One dog avoided this fate when it arrived at the home of Jennifer and Tony who arrived in Lambertville three years ago. As animal lovers, they opened their hearts to yet another of their three large canine friends.
Why so little mention of kitties, birds, rabbits, etc.? Well these pets do better at home with plenty of stimulation and love. Unless cats have ample room to roam, they are prey to one of the scourges of development — being hit by cars. Additionally, cats can transfer life-taking diseases such as feline leukemia and AIDS.
Better to keep that kitty in the window than to cut the animals life short by carelessness.
Holidays are a time of the year when many families resolve to answer their children’s request to purchase a pet.
"How wonderful it would be to give a little puppy, kitten or feathered friend," we think, no matter how many times we are told to think carefully before buying an animal or to never give animals as gifts.
Shelters cannot handle the returns. Reason often is swayed by sentimentality, and yet another animal is brought back from hence it came or, in the worse circumstances, turned out on the streets.
Many pet shops, puppy mills and some breeders are eager to supply the holiday rush for it is the time of the year they can make the most sales. Perhaps I am so solicitous about the responsibility taken for animals because I came from a family that brought in and discarded animals at a whim. We had them all: cheery Cocker Spaniels, a wonderful collie mix from the pound, a Jack Russell terrier and so on. The pets stayed just long enough to break my heart.
After one vanished, I remember running from house to house late into the night trying to find him. The reasons they were given away were usually that having a pet was too much work. And my brothers and I were not picking up the slack. This was while we were in elementary school.
However bleak this may seem, my story is not unusual.
Although most children have a natural affinity for animals, it is in fact the rare child or any age who takes full responsibility for a pet. Teen-agers leave home for college or a job and guess who is in charge of the pet that is left behind.
Jane Checchi has written a wonderful guide for families entitled, "Are You the Pet for Me," published by St. Martin’s Press. Taking time to read this little book can provide just the information one needs before taking the big step.
Of all the purchases you make as parents, few have more impact on your child and family than a pet. A dog can live for 10 to 15 years; a cat, for 15 to 20; a bird, for 30 years or more. The cost of purchasing and maintaining a pet can easily run to thousands of dollars, and pets need daily care.
The Humane Society publishes a free pamphlet called "Choosing a Pet." In it, it says families should be concerned for the safety of the child as well as the animal. A puppy that bites when playing rough or a kitten that will scratch most assuredly will be returned to a shelter.
The Humane Society also provides developmental guidelines as to how parents should permit children and pets to interact.
Do not leave infants alone with an animal.
Supervision is required with youngsters up to 5 years of age as animals are too exuberant and/or fragile to be handled.
Children 6 to 8 can help with care and playtime if supervised.
Children 8 to 12 can take more of an active role in care and training. As they have more activities outside of the home, they may lose interest in the care of the animal but will give lots of love.
Children 12 and older can take on more of a responsibility in care and training. They, too, will most likely lose interest in the care of the animal but can give lots of love.
After taking really thinking about what kind of pet would be comfortable in your home, and the expenses involved, it is time to start looking for a healthy and responsive animal. The local animal shelters are a good place to start, and they often have adorable young and older animals.
Another source of healthy pets can be in the local newspapers or from carefully screened Internet sites. If you are thinking of going to a pet shop, make sure it has a good reputation for healthy animals.
A word of caution would be to avoid puppy mill and kitty mills animals as much as possible. These poor souls are often overbred and have a predisposition to genetic disorders.
And if you choose to purchase a dog, please introduce them to mine when walking on the towpath, the circle or meandering around town.
Dr. Sakharov is a psychologist with degrees in curriculum and teaching, special education, early childhood special education, children’s literature and psychology. She lives in New Hope.