I remember the time my cousin, Danny, ate three cans of pork and beans warmed Boy Scout-style over an open fire.
The afternoon was a lot of fun, but when we came back to grandma’s farmhouse that evening, Danny was — not to put too fine a point on it — starting to feel a bit gaseous. And, as the family was sitting around the living room that evening watching “McHale’s Navy,” the beans began working full-tilt boogie through his tortured innards.
“Good gracious, what is that smell?” grandma asked, peering over her glasses.
Danny, whose angelic features masked a deceptive soul, shrugged his shoulders and pointed at grandpa’s geriatric Labrador, who was curled up on the living room rug, chasing rabbits in his sleep.
“The dog did it,” he said, gesturing at the innocent beast.
Nobody believed him, of course, and from then on whenever grandma wanted to know who was responsible for the latest social outrage, we’d all point at old Blackie.
And we kept on blaming him even after poor Blackie died, pointing to the spot where he used to sleep, howling, “The dog did it!”
I recalled that falsely accused canine this week when an astute reporter and editor in the newsroom busted James Devine, a Democratic political operative and publisher of several newspapers in Union and Middlesex counties, for pulling a dirty trick on Amy Handlin and Sam Thompson, Republicans who are running for the state Assembly from the 13th District, which serves portions of Monmouth County and the Old Bridge section of Middlesex County. Confronted with his deception — and apparently not having a dog around — Devine blamed the mess on a “high school student” who made a mistake while posting data on a Web site owned by Devine Media Enterprises Inc.
Hoo-ha! What a knee-slapper! Needless to say, I don’t believe it, and neither should you.
For those unfamiliar with this story (which appeared in one Greater Media newspaper last week and appears in others this week), here are the important details in a nutshell.
When a press release arrived in our office, allegedly from Handlin and criticizing Monmouth County Sheriff Joe Oxley’s recent hiring of an inexperienced public relations person, the release invited readers to check out www.handlin-thompson.org on the Web for more information on the candidates’ positions. A little checking revealed that the site — which looked like it had been prepared by Handlin and Thompson, but stating questionable positions on things like same-sex marriage, minimum wage and medical marijuana — was registered not to Handlin or Thompson, but to Devine Media Enterprises Inc., of Rahway.
Handlin, when informed of the bogus site, was furious and made noises about a lawsuit.
Democrat Michael Dasaro, one of Handlin’s political opponents, denied having anything to do with it, despite the fact that Devine is a campaign worker for both Dasaro and William Flynn.
And Devine, when confronted with our information, admitted to posting the site, but said the high school student who works for him was really at fault.
“Someone exercised bad judgment,” Devine said. “It’s clear that the humor involved was inappropriate.”
Humor?
By the next day, the phony site was gone, replaced by a more blatantly political anti-Handlin/Thompson site. Devine, meanwhile, was issuing press releases under his own name on behalf of Flynn and Desaro, calling Handlin a hypocrite and accusing her of other acts of skullduggery.
If this goofy situation is an indication of things to come, voters in the 13th District can expect a very nasty campaign until the general election. But at least now they’ll have a better idea what shenanigans the Democrats will pull in order to win.
For his part, Devine should have known better.
In addition to its Internet site, Devine Media Inc., of which James Devine is the publisher, prints five newspapers in Union and Middlesex counties, including the Atom Tabloid in Woodbridge, the News Record in Elizabeth, the Clark Patriot, the Perth Amboy Gazette and the South Amboy Citizen. He should have known that creating a bogus Web site and sending out fraudulent press releases might come back to haunt him and the candidates he works for.
After his antics during the despicable campaign for Middletown Township Committee in 2003, and forcing a divisive Republican primary battle for the Assembly this year, I’ll confess I initially suspected to find Assemblyman Joe Azzolina’s fingerprints on this somewhere. So far though, it looks like he’s clean.
*****
This month’s Politician in Need of a Backbone award goes to Monmouth County Sheriff Joe Oxley, who threw young Janna Montague to the wolves in order to get himself out of hot water for a spectacularly bad decision.
By now, most readers know that Oxley found himself in a public relations nightmare a few weeks ago when it was revealed he’d hired Montague — a recent college grad with no serious job experience — as a deputy in his department responsible for public relations, at $62,000 a year.
The firestorm of criticism began almost immediately, with Oxley taking flak from various media outlets, county politicians and the general public.
Last week, after what I hear was a strong suggestion from Oxley, Montague fell on her sword and resigned from the job, adding herself to county taxpayers as victims in this disaster.
From what I hear, Montague is a bright young woman who didn’t deserve to be thrown into this foreseeable maelstrom and who’s been left unemployed and twisting in the wind.
If we remember anything from this, it’s that Joe Oxley was responsible for creating this situation, and shouldn’t be allowed to slink away from it just because Montague did the honorable thing. Oxley should answer for this debacle, and we mustn’t let him blame the dog.
Gregory Bean is executive editor
of Greater Media Newspapers.