Book Notes for the week of Nov. 24

Giving Thanks

Dr. Joan Ruddiman
   The house is too small.
   We’ve known this for as long as we have hosted Thanksgiving dinner. The dining room is comfortable with eight people, find-your-seat-and-never-get-up with 10 people.
   We solved the problem of how to all have dinner together by adding a smaller table in the adjoining parlor. Truly, it is not big enough to be called a living room. With the piano, it is more aptly referred to as the music room because that is about all that happens there.
   Except at Thanksgiving. For many years, we all fit. It was tight, but we made the effort in order to all be together. In part, we tried to avoid the dreaded children’s table, where anyone 18 and younger would sit, isolated, in the kitchen.
   Then we started to have little ones added to the mix. Patrick and baby brother Sean were the youngsters for quite a while. Then Ed and Kathy announced the pending adoption of their twins during one memorable sharing of blessings and the next year we welcomed Anna and Elena as the youngest to celebrate the day with us.
   With the addition of the children’s beloveds, the immediate family is expanding. True to our Celtic roots, this means Jack has joined Bert — fathers of those we love — in places of honor at the table.
   We no longer fit in close proximity. The family room doubles as the second dining room for the day. There still is no designated children’s table. Folks pretty much choose where to sit based on availability of the football games on TV or for the kids — how quickly they want to be excused to play. That leaves out the dining room — the sit-and-don’t-move feasting area.
   The holiday, however, extends well beyond the actual day. We realize the house — not just the dining room — is too small. Wives, fiancées and friends visit for the weekend in what has become the favorite time of the year. Once the big day is over, those who remain enjoy the leftovers and the fun of just hanging out for a couple more days.
   Now the challenge is where to put everyone who stays over. The empty bedrooms are full to capacity as other rooms are commandeered for makeshift bedrooms. Air mattresses, extra sheets and blankets plus lots of towels are made ready.
   The "kids" stay up very late with wine, videos, cards and lots of chatting. Mom and Dad hang in the best we can before giving in to middle-aged circadian rhythms that follow the path of the sun. When it comes up, we wake up. When it goes down, it takes a bunch of caffeine to stay awake.
   When the whirl of the weekend — that really starts on Wednesday afternoon — winds down on Sunday, we do the "bed and breakfast" cleanup. Launder the linens and towels, pack away the air mattress, and think about eating out for a couple days to recoup from cooking.
   As we count the Thanksgiving blessings that extend throughout the year we do have to consider one "however."
   The house is just too big.
   Dr. Joan Ruddiman, Ed.D., is a teacher and friend of the Allentown Public Library.