PHASE THREE by Arnold Bornstein: Thoughts about the land and sea

Cruises bring up questions, thoughts about formal attire

By: Arnold Bornstein
   A recent cruise to Bermuda, like nearly every other cruise I’ve taken, featured a formal night during which guests were given the opportunity to dress up in tuxedos and gowns for dinner. This evidently goes back several decades to a more elegant era of cruising, when ships put more emphasis on glitter and glamor, and were more pricey.
   Even today, there are several British vessels, among others I assume, that have separate dining rooms, depending on the cost of your booking. This is contrary to the recent trend in which all guests eat in the same dining areas, but the tradition of a formal night continues.
   Formal wear wasn’t mandatory aboard our ship, so many men wore regular suits, sports jackets or — myself included —- sport shirts. Many women, including my wife, wore what fashion mavens may call "casual chic."
   If you’re planning a carefree, relaxing five-night cruise, but also plan to dress up for formal night, then you’ll have to also carefully pack your tuxedo and gown and all the paraphernalia that goes with them.
   For added convenience, you could have a rented tuxedo delivered to your stateroom. Keeping in mind that it’s a business, the tux rental is $85, plus $12 for black formal shoes, $6 for socks and $5 for suspenders, for a total of $108. That’s $108 just in dressing up for dinner (hopefully, without food stains). Add a premium bottle of wine and some formal portrait photos of you and your family, and you could say that you’re cruisin’ first class.
   On the other hand, when you’re clad in a bathing suit and sitting in a deck chair under the sun, watching screaming kids as adults are popping in and out of the pool, you may wonder about the need for a formal night.
   I believe for most cruise travelers, today’s on-board lifestyle is informal. Formal night appears to be tolerated, but something that can be done without. Several years ago, there was small cruise line that eliminated formal nights on its ships. The company eventually sold its business to another firm, but it didn’t have to do it because it had dropped formal nights.
   I have nothing against evening gowns, classic black tuxedos, white dinner jackets or the recent trend toward vest sets rather than cummerbunds and bow ties. In fact, I recently purchased a formal vest set, even though I already own a classic black tuxedo (which goes back to our son and daughter-in-law’s wedding and even still fits). So when an invitation says "Black Tie," I don’t cringe or become annoyed. I actually look forward to events that call for formal attire.
   My point is that formal attire is appropriate for formal occasions, but in today’s lifestyle, formality doesn’t seem to be appropriate on cruise ships. However, they do have weddings on cruise ships, when formal attire could be appropriate, but I’ll cross that bridge — or ship — when I come to it.
   Since our ship departed for Bermuda from the docks of Bayonne, which is a 45-minute car ride from home, we didn’t have to fly to another seaport to board.
   The round-trip cruise was a smooth ride, except for when we hit some rough seas during the first day at sea. One of the bars on board had a singing pianist and musical trivia contests. One trivia night featured pop tunes from the past 40 or 50 years — and my wife got a number of them correct.
   Another night, the contest was musical themes from hit television shows of the past 50 years. Only a few notes were played from each theme, but the two winners each got all of them right.
   Our daughter, who recalled a few of the theme songs from her childhood, seemed startled that anybody would know all of them or even a large majority of them. She reflected that it appeared to be a sad commentary that evidently so many people had spent so much time watching so much television shows in the past 50 years or so. I noted proudly that I have not been watching much television at home, and primarily watch the news, sports and a couple of favorite shows.
   My wife interrupted to point out the amount of time I spend on our computer on a daily basis. In my defense, I emphasized that I read "The New York Times" daily on-line, do some research and consider reading on-line similar to reading a book. I added that I have experienced technical difficulties in recent weeks and have been in abundant contact with tech support.
   My argument did not prove persuasive. However, for fellow computer users who may be facing some technical difficulties, here’s some advice that can be attributed to writer Agnes Allen: "When all else fails, read the instructions."
Arnold Borstein is a resident of Greenbriar at Whittingham in Monroe.