Dawn Katzman’s family says Christmas was always her favorite time of the year.
By: Minx McCloud
The well-kept house on Woodland Avenue in Middlesex Borough stands silent, looking lonely. A porch light burns as if waiting for its owner to come home, but she never will.
Dawn Renee Katzman, a former Hillsborough resident, was brutally murdered there on Nov. 25, and police have accused her former live-in boyfriend, Andrejz "Andy" Bartman, with the crime. He pleaded not guilty in state Superior Court in New Brunswick last week and awaits trial (See story below).
During the past 12 days, friends and family have left many candles and bouquets at the property as a memorial to Mrs. Katzman. Until a few days ago, the door that police broke open to discover the murder was covered with plywood. The family shared their thoughts about their tragic loss by writing on the barrier in black marking pens.
However, in spite of their anger and grief over Dawn Katzman’s death, the family still took time to reminisce about her life a life unfairly cut short and deeply mourned.
"Dawn was confident and ambitious, always happier with a paintbrush in her hand than with a credit card at the mall!" her mother, Linda Steiner of Hillsborough, said.
However, Mrs. Katzman’s grown daughters said that as far as shopping was concerned, she was looking forward to buying presents for the family at Christmas.
"Her new hobby was shopping at the mall," Lisa Katzman, 22, of Hillsborough said. "She loved telling me everything she had bought."
She added that her mother also enjoyed miniature golf, roller coasters and "scary movies." However, the family members agreed that they will never be able to watch a scary movie again after what happened in the house in Middlesex.
Mrs. Katzman loved bowling in the Monday Night Mixed League at Manville Lanes with other members of her family on her team, as evidenced by a huge bowling pin made of flowers that sits next to her house. Her daughter, Diana Curran, 25, of Piscataway, said her friends in the league sent it.
The entire league enjoyed "bowling poker," introduced by the family, in which the players put money into a kitty and earned playing cards during the game. At the end of the game, the person with the best poker hand won the pot.
"We’re a family of gamblers," Lisa Katzman said. Her mother enjoyed going to Atlantic City with friends and was looking forward to an upcoming trip her first to Las Vegas.
Mrs. Katzman’s favorite drink was vodka and tonic, and she loved Goober’s chocolate covered peanuts. Did she consume the strange combination at the same time?
"Depends on how many vodka tonics she drank," one of her daughters replied, and everyone laughed.
Mrs. Steiner was somber though, as she described her deep feelings about her daughter.
"She was my firstborn and my best friend," she said. "I don’t know how to describe the relationship we had, except that it was extraordinary. We went on vacations together. We talked on the phone a lot there was a lot of communication."
She said she is having a terrible time coping with her loss.
"Right now that the horror is over, I have spells now and then when I have to cry, and I just let it come," she said. "I feel the better for it. I will miss her every minute of every day for the rest of my life, and I’m going have to learn to live this new life I’ve been put into."
She added that she has a hard time focusing on everyday activities.
"I went out to the store before and wound up someplace else. As a mother, I would not wish this pain on anyone. There can be no greater loss."
Mrs. Steiner said that at her job working in a doctor’s office, she had encountered a woman whose son had died under tragic circumstances a few weeks ago. She had known the woman for some years and tried to console her.
"It was difficult, because there are really no words," Mrs. Steiner said. "I told her, ‘I can’t possibly know how you feel losing a child.’ Now, I do."
During the Nov. 30 service at Hillsborough Funeral Home, several family members spoke in soft tones, between tears, extolling the virtues of the woman they knew as mother, sister, daughter, aunt, grandmother and friend. Grief weighed heavily on the attendees, and the air was thick with sadness. It felt as if the least vibration would send the very walls of the funeral home crashing down upon the mourners.
Muffled sobs and whispers prevailed as one by one, friends and family members filed by Mrs. Katzman’s casket to say a final goodbye. The funeral procession was composed of about 75 cars, and ended at New Cemetery, Somerville, where she was laid to rest beside her beloved former fiancé, Joe Meister, who died six years ago from a heart attack.
Mrs. Katzman, a graduate of Hillsborough High School Class of 1981, was the first female ever to receive the school’s architectural drafting award. She was employed as a kitchen designer for the past 15 years at Royal Cabinet Co. in Hillsborough.
"She was interested in building things from the time she was old enough to hold a Lego," Mrs. Steiner said. "The houses she built were exotic, with extensions, roofs, and furniture made out of Legos. She loved to draw houses, and when she got to high school, she took drafting classes. Her boss (at Royal Cabinet) said her work was exceptional."
"She just finished my kitchen three weeks ago," Mrs. Curran said.
"She was going to do my counter top soon," added Mrs. Katzman’s other daughter, Sandra Kubilus, 21, of Manville.
The important thing, the family agreed, was that Mrs. Katzman had a job she loved. In fact, since she had broken up with Mr. Bartman a month or so ago, the family described her as being happier than she had ever been since her former fiancé had died.
Daniel Katzman Jr., 16, of Hillsborough, the youngest of the four children, said he had mixed feelings during this awful ordeal. He had his own room at the Middlesex house and describes himself as the only family member to really know Mr. Bartman.
"I was often here, enjoying watching TV with the both of them," he said. "I wouldn’t say I was friends with him, but we would hang out from time to time. He was a gambler like the rest of us. One day, I picked the winning lottery numbers, but he didn’t play them. We talked about it for weeks, how if we had won, we would never have had to work again. We could have our own place."
He shook his head ruefully.
"If we won, we were going buy an island, build a house, and it would be our own little community," Ms. Katzman interjected.
"It’s just really hard for me," Mr. Katzman said. "Nobody else had the relationship I had with both of them."
He went on to say he was always happy to see his mom in the stands when he played football.
"It was special having her, my dad and my grandma watching me play," he said, his eyes downcast.
One of the activities the family enjoyed the most was vacationing by the ocean. They traveled to Long Beach Island for many years, and then began renting a summer cottage at Virginia Beach. After 25 years of "beach memories," the family still laughs about Mrs. Katzman’s love of the ocean.
"That was our big thing the ocean," Mrs. Steiner said. "We would sit in the sun, seeing who was getting sunburned faster. She was the first one in and the last one out. Sometimes, as early as 7 in the morning, we’d just be rolling out of bed for coffee, and she would be coming in from the beach to see what was taking us so long."
At night, they’d get out the poker chips and play.
"The kids could have been out going to bars or parties, but they stayed home and played cards with the old folks," Mrs. Steiner said with a sad smile.
During the funeral service, Mrs. Steiner said, "My life is forever changed. The sun will never be as bright, the sky as blue, the flowers as beautiful, or the ocean as wondrous. Sleep well, my child. I pray someday we will meet again on a sandy beach, unfold our lawn chairs, and share another day lying in the sun listening to the sound of the waves and watching the dolphins swim by."
Mrs. Kubilus and Mrs. Curran described their mother as having "infectious laughter" and a "beautiful smile." Her eyes lit up when she smiled, they said, stumbling over each other’s words in their eagerness to describe the mother they loved so deeply.
The women take comfort in the fact that they have some of their mother’s characteristics.
"I have her eyes," Mrs. Kubilus said. "I’m happy about that. And Lisa and I both have her temper." She smiled a bit grimly, as if remembering some rough times.
"Sandy and I were her little terrors," Lisa said, a sparkle in her eyes.
"I was told I have her strength," Mrs. Curran added. She also said that her mother was with her in the delivery room for the birth of her son, and "that was the happiest moment I could ask for."
Now the Christmas holidays are looming on the horizon, and it will be a sad and difficult time for the family.
"She loved Christmas more than anyone I ever knew," Mrs. Steiner said. "We have to do Christmas this year. She would be heartbroken if we didn’t. She was so excited. It was the first year with her grandbabies and shopping for them. Her last e-mail to me was ‘This will be the best Christmas ever.’ "
"She used to count down the days until Christmas," Ms. Katzman said.
"She said ‘this year I actually have money,’ " Mrs. Kubilus added.
The family plans to use family pictures to memorialize Mrs. Katzman at Christmas, surrounding the pictures with poinsettias and cinnamon-scented candles (her favorite). On Christmas Day, they will light the candles and take comfort in the display.
"We’ll have her looking down on us," Mrs. Steiner said.
Mrs. Katzman also left behind three cats, and an ailing Akita named Katana. Grief knows no bounds, and even pets are affected. On top of this tragedy, a new home must be found for Katana, who needs special medical attention in a home without children.
Mrs. Katzman herself was able to offer some words of advice to her family, in the form of a "testimony" that she wrote to her family about her feelings after the loss of Mr. Meister.
The testimony was read at the funeral and spoke of the grief, emptiness, and misery she felt after her fiancé died. She described her later revelation that, in some way, he was still with her. She wrote that she was filled with a sense of sudden joy and love. A devout Christian, Mrs. Katzman concluded:
"I have known since that day that Joe is in heaven, along with all of our loved ones, and he’s waiting, so I’ll enjoy life to the fullest while here, knowing that I’ll see him again. I also believe the feeling of absolute joy and love must be what we will feel in heaven. I also believe Jesus let me feel it for that moment so I would know Joe was okay. It’s indescribable, but I can assure you it’s nothing I’ve ever felt before.
"I have never felt that emptiness again."

