Friends mourn Barry Barclay

Highlighting the life of Barry Barclay

By: Emily Holody
   Barry Adams Barclay lived in the spirit of volunteerism, giving all of his time to others. Because of this, his friends and family will remember him as a volunteer and a caring, giving man who opened his home and heart to anyone and everyone.
   But he especially will be remembered as a man with an unmatched sense of humor.
   "The way he could make anybody laugh, whether it be sarcasm, just joking around with them, or giving them a hard time in a loving way," said Christopher Hampton Barclay, Mr. Barclay’s eldest son. "He just loved to make people laugh, and it was never at the expense of someone."
   Mr. Barclay, 62, lived in his family home on Orchardside Road in Cranbury for the entirety of his life. He attended Cranbury School and Lawrenceville Prep, and graduated from Cornell University in 1967 with a degree in mechanical engineering.
   Three generations of Barclays have owned and lived in the house on the Barclay farm where Mr. Barclay died on May 28 after battling cancer for two and a half years. His wife and two sons were with him during his final days.
   On Monday, the house was solemn. Posterboard collages filled with photographs chronicling Mr. Barclay’s life were on display in the living room. The photographs showed him as a happy man surrounded often by friends and family.
   Mr. Barclay was an aerospace engineer for the U.S. Navy. He worked at the West Trenton Naval Air Warfare Center for 34 years, until 1998 when the base closed. He then worked at Lakehurst Naval Station until he retired in 2000. He was passionate about his work, and he had what his family called an engineering spirit.
   "Part of the engineering piece of him is that he was very logical, he loved crossing things off a list, getting them done," said Jerri Barclay, Barry’s wife of 37 years. "He was also a very intelligent man."
   Ms. Barclay said he never made a big point of how hard he worked. He was easygoing and his friends saw him as the life of the party.
   "He was able to strike this balance that was awe-inspiring. He was such a brilliant man when it came to engineering, so intelligent on so many levels and was so hard working. He met every level of responsibility," said Christopher Barclay. "Then at the same time, he had this quality where he could completely relax and really enjoy that moment of life. It’s what everybody strives for, and he hit it perfectly."
   Although his family owned the Barclay farm for generations, Mr. Barclay owned and founded the Barclay Tree Farm, a Christmas Tree farm.
   "His dad always wanted his boys to be farmers. I guess this was just his green thumb coming out," said Ms. Barclay. He then became a member of the New Jersey Christmas Tree Grower’s Association.
   Mr. Barclay, in his spirit of volunteerism, joined the South Brunswick Shade Tree Commission where he spent 20 years as an active member.
   "He donated a lot of his time to South Brunswick Township through the Shade Tree Commission," said Ms. Barclay. "Thousands of trees that are around the township are because of him and the work he’s done on the committee."
   The Shade Tree Commission is responsible for ensuring that new neighborhoods have plenty of shade trees planted, and also oversees the removal and replacement of dead shade trees throughout the township.
   In addition, Mr. Barclay was a coach, referee, and board member of the South Brunswick Soccer Club. He coached many local soccer, basketball, and baseball teams, always those his sons played on. His youngest son, Stephen Adams Barclay, said Mr. Barclay mostly coached recreational teams that anyone could join. By the end of the season, Mr. Barclay would have kids who had never kicked a soccer ball before playing well.
   "He was a really, really good coach," said Stephen Barclay. He loved sports, especially golf, and although he hardly watched television, he would come in from working on the tree farm to check golf scores.
   He was not an idle person whatsoever, but rather used all of his time productively — and his free time usually went to other people.
   "He never really needed his own time, he always gave all of his time, to family, the house, friends, township, just always wanting to help, always wanting to do things," said Stephen Barclay.
   In the end, nothing could have been better for Mr. Barclay than to have been surrounded by his family, as he was undoubtedly a family man.
   "It was never a question that family was the top priority. We always knew that we came first," said Christopher Barclay.
   Mr. Barclay and his family were especially happy that he was able to witness the exchanging of vows during the recent wedding of Christopher and his wife, Holly. Although Mr. Barclay could not be present for the actual ceremony in Boston due to his illness, a web-cam allowed him to witness the marriage.
   "He’d always wanted a daughter," said Ms. Barclay, becoming emotional.
   "(Holly and my father) had enough time together where each of them could truly appreciate the other person, and Holly really was the daughter dad never had," Christopher Barclay added.
   One of Mr. Barclay’s last wishes was for his tree farm to be preserved by the state so that it would never be developed. His application was approved and the tree farm will continue on after him.
   In addition to his wife and children, he is survived by his brothers, John H. "Jack" Barclay and Edward H. "Ted" Barclay and his wife, Joyce; and several nieces, nephews, and cousins.