Pat Ellard

By: centraljersey.com
The voice from my dashboard is clear, but the instructions aren’t: Route 1 to I-95 to I-295, then back to I-95 going the other way – what’s going on here? Obviously my GPS isn’t getting me where I want to go – only to Hamilton, for heaven’s sake.
I arrive after an hour-long, round-about trip, wondering how I would ever get home again. Breathless, I hurry into the meeting and grab the nearest empty chair.
A stranger sitting one chair over turns to make me welcome. She asks me where I came from and how long it took. I tell her about my trip and the crazy directions. "Why not use Quakerbridge Road to Route 1 going back?" she asks. "You can you get home from Route 1, can’t you?" "Yes, but I don’t know how to get to Quakerbridge Road from here." I sound like a lost 2-year-old.
"When we leave, you can follow me to Quakerbridge Road. I’ll put my emergency blinkers on when we get there. Just go straight as I turn off," the stranger offers. It sounds too easy. Why is she doing this?
"What am I getting myself into by following her? Will she really help me or will I be even more lost? What kind of a person is she?" I worry. I said I’d follow her, but with some apprehension. We go to our cars in the gathering darkness. My car obediently follows hers out of the parking lot.
She is as good as her word. Quakerbridge Road is four quick turns and less than five minutes away. I blink in joy – I am really there! I arrive home in 30 minutes, very grateful to Mary Ann Isaac, the stranger at the meeting.
"It was nothing," Mary Ann says when I call the next day. "It’s the kind of thing we do all the time."
"We?" Curiosity tugs at my sleeve.
"Yes, we. I’m the executive director of Interfaith Caregivers of Trenton (ICT)," she says.
I have to know more. If this is how they treat strangers, they must be something special.
And they are. Dave Holland of Lawrence, one of their volunteers, describes it this way: "Manufacturing and marketing consumer goods is what I do, but Interfaith Caregivers is what brings meaning to my life."
Dave currently visits two men, both World War II veterans, one of whom won the Purple Heart at Normandy. Both the veterans share stories with Dave, and he shares photos and stories of his Dad, a Navy pilot, with them. Visiting time just flies by.
"Is it really interfaith?" I ask him. Yes, it is, Dave tells me. Dave is Episcopalian; one of the men he visits is Jewish. It doesn’t matter.
Another volunteer, a woman who refuses any publicity, thinks her volunteering can speak for itself. She said she isn’t affiliated with a particular religion. She worked for The Robert Wood Johnson Foundation for 20 years, and during that time the foundation supported Interfaith Caregivers. She saw their work in action, so volunteering with ICT was a natural for her. She currently visits a woman who asked for help with shopping eight years ago. Over those eight years they have become friends. "The woman has a lot of vision to share. She reminds me of what’s important in life," my quiet volunteer says.
Mary Ann Isaac says that Interfaith Caregivers of Trenton has coordinators in more than 25 churches and congregations throughout Mercer, including Lawrence and Pennington. The Quiet One doesn’t attend any of them. "How can you volunteer if you are not affiliated?" I ask her. She tells me that Mary Ann coordinates interfaith work. Since there is no effort at conversion and no volunteer or care-receiver is turned away on the basis of faith, it doesn’t matter.
Many of the care-receivers find help through their congregations, but not all. "About 40 percent of our care-receivers are referred to us through medical personnel," Mary Ann says. Those people may not currently be affiliated with any faith because they have problems getting around, and they may have stopped going.
Care-receivers morph into friends. Dave takes his computer with him on his visits so he can show pictures or play games online with the men he visits. The Quiet One had the joy of driving her first care-receiver to each place that had been important in her life. As they drove, the woman described each place in such detail that the Quiet One could see why she loved it. The woman’s daughters work during the day, so it was the Quiet One who got to go to those important places and hear the stories behind them. "What a joy for the care-receiver to have someone to share the stories with!" I think to myself.
ICT is a tremendous help to people who want to stay in their own homes. Whether the problem is age or a handicap makes no difference to ICT. A person can call ICT directly for help, or they may be referred by their congregation or by a medical professional. After that initial request, a trained contact person makes the first visit to assess the need and judge which volunteer fits the situation best. Volunteers are trained, too, and they report back what they find and how the visits are going.
Sometimes the volunteers find it hard to make the first connection. But connections between people are what ICT is all about, and the volunteers make it work.
For Jay Greenberg of Pennington, the connection is baseball. Jay roots for the Yankees; his care-receiver loves the Phillies. But they enjoy watching ball games together, and they’ve been doing it for three years now.
Jay started with ICT thinking the experience would be wonderful for his daughters. "It turns out my daughters are too young," Jay says, but he loves the work and has joined the Board of ICT, with his wife’s approval. Volunteering is a family thing, Jay thinks. He sees the kinds of needs the care-receivers have – rides, help with shopping or gardening or some simple repair work. ICT fills those needs, but their real focus, the most important need, is for companionship.
Mary Ann Isaac agrees. She says that each person is a mystery. "When you are allowed into a person’s life, it goes beyond (the visible)," she says. Sometimes they share things they don’t tell their own families. But the volunteers are there, making the connections, letting them know they are important, that they are treasured.
Executive director since 1997, Mary Ann is making way for a new agency head, Sarah A. Thoma, who headed the Governor’s Office of Volunteerism from 2002 to 2006. Both woman are excited to be taking part in a new chapter in ICT’s 16-year story. But the mission remains unchanged: "Neighbors Helping Neighbors to Remain Independent."
To learn more about Interfaith Caregivers of Trenton, visit www.ictrenton.org. Or, better still, call 609-393-9922 and join them at their annual brunch, "Shining Lights," at the Trenton Country Club on Sunday, Oct. 24, from 1 to 4 p.m. Tickets are $75.