Every year we like to look back at the typographical and grammatical errors that almost made it into some of GreaterMedia Newspapers’ 10 weekly publications.
These near-gaffes come not only from our own staff, but also from our readers, PR representatives and even job applicants.
As hard as the writers and editors try to keep our copy error-free, the pressure of deadlines and the lack of typing (and language) skills result in some very amusing “bloopers” that we enjoy sharing with our readers, because we’d like them to know that although these were caught in time, we know that more than a few weren’t. Channeling Allison DuBois One of our entertainment listings referred to “Lisa Williams, internationally acclaimed medium and claircoyant [clairvoyant].” One can almost hear this coquettish psychic saying, “I do declare, Sugah, it’s time for you to cross over!”
Go toward the light…
In a story about the annual Relay for Life event, we quoted one of the organizers as saying: “Everyone has been touched in some way by cancer, and this is a way to keep the memory of loved ones that have passed alive and to honor the survivors.” We think the speaker meant to say it’s a way to keep alive the memory of loved ones, rather than urging someone to cross over while he or she is still breathing!
Starchucks, anyone?
One reader emailed us about a fundraiser for Haiti, whose location was near Duncan [Dunkin’] Donuts. If you have a business plan for a specialty coffee shop startup, don’t let someone’s legal business name stop you. Just change it enough to try to fool the trademark police.
Arsonist’s remorse?
“Firefighters saved a semi-conscience [semiconscious] woman from her burning home last week.”
Fire extinguishers, please stand by
“They donated their time and talents towards the success of this fundraiser, and it really added a special flare [flair] to the night, which we are all very grateful for.” A visit from the fire department is probably not the special event they intended.
A similar misunderstanding of those homophones was published in a local paper about TV food celebrity Sandra Lee:
“Lee, 43, turned a flare [flair] with draperies into Kurtain Kraft and made her millions when she was still in her 20s.” Another homophone challenge
In a story, a reporter wrote: “Wavers [waivers] have been requested for the location of trees.” We can just see the wavers, signaling madly: Here, over here, plant the trees here.”
Makes purrfect sense
“You can’t take a [pay] freeze for six months and save the whole kitten caboodle [kit and caboodle].” C’mon, they’re kittens, for heaven’s sake.
Ferris Bueller? Ferris Bueller?
A nonprofit health center wanted to advertise its mobile medical unit, which was offering some interesting opportunities: “Adult medical exams only, minor illnesses and adult immunizations will be offered at Scotts Market.” No need to feign illness to get a sick day; a variety of minor ailments are available for the asking and with a doctor’s note to boot!
Singing, ‘Do wah diddy diddy dum, diddy do’
In a draft of a story about a local singer who’s worked with singer-entrepreneur Sean John Combs, aka Puff Daddy, aka P. Diddy, aka Diddy, aka Sean John, we wrote what is actually a fitting name for the everevolving rapper: P. Ditty.
Don’t let computer lingo bog you down
In an article about cyberbullying, we warned parents to beware of Internet bogs [blogs] and also urged them to “Goggle [Google] your child’s name.” Designer fireworks
In an apparent attempt to allow this fair to one-up every other carnival, we wrote that the North Brunswick Carnevale fireworks would be by the designer Gucci. Apologies to the Grucci family. We did eventually notice that while on deadline and recalled as many calendar pages as we could.
Tickle-down economics
“I think you spoke in generalities, but specifically you said it [savings] will tickle down to them.”
Every taxpayer wants to save money, but that sounds a little intrusive.
Calling Pope Benedict XVI
Volunteers beatify [beautify] area near pond in Milltown.
Criminal coif
One of our writers realized in time that she had typed Rug EnforcementAgency instead of Drug EnforcementAgency. But we decided that it wasn’t such a bad idea to have an official agency issuing fines for bad hairpieces.
How ‘ken’ I help you?
A résumé we received for a staff writer position noted that the applicant had recent “costumer [customer] service skills.” She’s probably got the clothes for the job; now she just needs the language skills.
Wishful thinking
“A silent auction to fight prostrate [prostate] cancer will be held …” This is what we all want: to see cancer prostrate or at least brought to its knees.
‘Gulliver’s Travels’
A local resident’s travels “have taken him from the jungles of Guadalcanal to the top of Mr. Suribachi.” Could this be the world’s tallest man?
Help! Let me out…
“Tucked away inside the borough’s municipal center, volunteers from the… Food Pantry stuffed rows of brown paper grocery bags with cranberry sauce, yams, mashed potatoes and other Thanksgiving staples to be distributed to needy families.” If volunteers came more willingly, they wouldn’t have to be stowed away until needed.
Ho ho ho …
We almost embarrassed the Monmouth Museum by calling its holiday exhibit “Ho [Go] Green for the Holidays.” Imagine patrons’ shock at being greeted by pretty elves in tight miniskirts.
Fort Monmouth Federal Penitentiary
“Atownship was sentenced last week to 26 months in prison on an extortion conspiracy charge …” What we meant to say was “A township man …”
Once again, our favorite
In an article this summer about a proposed liquefied natural gas facility on a man-made island off the coast of Sea Bright, we “quoted” an environmental activist:
“Public opinion is going to be in opposition because this project makes no pubic sense.”
And again recently, we typed a headline about town officials discussing how to cut solid waste and recycling costs: “Council and Dept. of Pubic Works mulling various options.”
The above mistakes were thankfully caught in time. Although we’re sure more mistakes than we care to admit inadvertently made their way into our 10 publications, people have been kind this year and didn’t point too many out. The serious ones, of course, resulted in published corrections, but the amusing ones that deserve their place here were few and far between. We hope our readers will help us in this department and let us know how we can close next year with a smile. After all, why should Jay Leno have all the fun?
Adele Young is the news editor for Greater Media Newspapers, which publishes 10 weekly newspapers in Middlesex, Monmouth and Ocean counties. She may be contacted at [email protected].