By Bernadette Suski-Harding, Special Writer
Jeff and Beth Hettinger think about their son, Aleksey, a Russian orphan, every single day.
”His room is decorated. He has toys. He has books. His photo is on the ‘grandchildren shelf’ at my parents’ house. He has an entire family waiting for him with open arms,” says Mr. Hettinger.
While Aleksey’s family waits patiently for him to join them in the U.S., Aleksey, 16 months old, waits in a Russian orphanage 5,300 miles away.
Does he remember the nice couple who spent a week visiting with him in September 2012, telling him they loved him, that they were his new mommy and daddy, and that they couldn’t wait to bring him home to America?
The Hettingers hope. They pray. And they wait, as they have every day since Dec. 28, 2012, when Russian President Vladimir Putin signed a law banning the adoption of Russian children by American citizens — and trapping 46 children, Aleksey among them, in a bureaucratic limbo.
On Saturday, May 11, the Hettingers will speak.
They will travel to Rocky Hill from their home in Westfield to watch — for the second time — a screening of the award-winning documentary STUCK, which follows three families through the international adoption process.
The Hettingers want to make sure that when the documentary ends and the house lights come on, every person in the audience understands, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that real lives are at stake.
”The compelling nature of the documentary makes a strong impression, but as people living this who are physically there, we felt we could bridge the gap between screen and reality that inevitably starts to form when the lights go on,” Mrs. Hettinger says.
When they watched the documentary for the first time, Mr. Hettinger says, they felt less alone.
”There were others who went on the arduous journey we’re on now, didn’t give up, and are a continued inspiration for us,” he says.
The Hettingers say they won’t give up, either.
”We waited and hoped for three years, met our child in September, spent a week with him, and left thinking of him as our own — as if we had given birth to him,” Mrs. Hettinger says. “This seems so natural to us to feel this way.
”We left having made a promise to him that we would be back and we would provide a home, a family, and a future for him. We’re doing everything we can — just like the folks seen in the film — to fulfill that promise,” she says.
According to Mrs. Hettinger, the U.S. Department of State is aware of the Hettingers’ case, and the cases of the 45 other Russian children waiting to join their American families.
”The Russian government is also aware, through our reach-outs to them, that the families are here and doing whatever we can to come to an agreeable solution,” Mrs. Hettinger says. “But unfortunately, despite the urgency of the situation and the children caught in the middle, there is little to no visible progress to report.”
On a mission
STUCK, an award-winning film, was created by Both Ends Burning, a non-profit dedicated to international adoption reform. Craig Juntunen, the organization’s founder and executive producer of the film, says he believes passionately that it is every child’s fundamental right to have the opportunity to grow up in a loving family.
”The documentary was designed to raise awareness — and outrage — over the deplorable system for international adoption. Bureaucracy, inefficiencies and politics keep children incarcerated in orphanages around the world, when loving families are willing and eager to adopt them,” says Dinah Brooks, director of communications for the Both Ends Burning Campaign.
Mr. Juntunen’s vision, Ms. Brooks says, “is for STUCK to be a change agent in reforming the current broken process of international adoption.”
Mr. Juntunen set out March 1 on a bus tour of the U.S., with a plan to visit 60 cities in 78 days and collect a million signatures for a petition calling on the president and the members of Congress to establish the U.S. as an “effective, proactive champion for every child’s right to a permanent loving family,” and “remove barriers to international adoption.” (The petition can be viewed at www.bothendsburning.org.)
The last screening is May 16 in Washington, D.C., followed by the Step Forward for Orphans March on Capitol Hill the following day.
Across the country, volunteers are helping spread the word.
People like Susan Belfiore, of Princeton, who traveled to Romania in 1991 to volunteer in an orphanage, and wound up adopting with her husband four young children (three girls and one boy), all HIV-positive and under the age of 2.
”They’re good and strong and healthy, though at the time we adopted them, one of the girls was really sick and probably would have died if we hadn’t adopted her,” says Mrs. Belfiore, who has helped sell tickets to the screening.
After adopting the kids and settling back down to life in the U.S., Mrs. Belfiore became pregnant. “I was 45,” she said laughing. “I had a boy, and he’s 17 now.”
Also aiding the cause was Jeanne Murphy Public Relations, of Ringoes, who publicized the Montgomery screening pro bono.
The documentary “STUCK” will be screened at The Montgomery Cinema, 1325 Route. 206, Skillman, on Saturday, May 11, at 7 p.m.
