BY CLARE MARIE CELANO
Staff Writer
Rachel Sender FREEHOLD — Four years ago Freehold Borough Patrolman Ronnie Steppat did the hardest thing he has ever had to do — he told the father of an 18-year-old girl that the young woman would never be coming home again.
“I had to knock on the door at 3 a.m. to tell this father that his daughter had been killed. He would never walk her down the wedding aisle. There would never be any grandchildren to hold,” Steppat said to a room full of Freehold High School students.
Steppat, who is Freehold Borough’s Drug Abuse Resistance Education (DARE) officer, was present at a Dec. 19 candlelight vigil that was held to reflect on and to remember those who have been killed at the hands of a drunk driver. He was joined at the moving ceremony by school administrators and borough officials.
The candlelight vigil held in the cafeteria of the high school was a joint effort between the Freehold Municipal Alliance for the Prevention of Alcoholism and Drug Abuse and students from the Adolescent Drug and Alcohol Prevention Team (ADAPT). Upon entering the cafeteria, each attendee received a plastic light to hold in lieu of a candle.
Principal Linda Jewell said she was pleased to see that people made time to attend the event during a very busy time of the year. She said New Year’s celebrations have always made her nervous. Jewell explained that the holiday was named for the Roman god Janus, a two-faced god who faces forward and backward.
“It is symbolic in that it looks forward to the new year being mindful of the previous year. New Year’s makes us concerned about what’s ahead. The older I get the more I realize how fragile life really is. Many things we have absolutely no control over,” Jewell said, citing examples of things such as a drunk driver or a serious illness.
“But when people increase the odds in spite of the fragility of life it is very puzzling to me when we can have absolute control over getting into a car and driving drunk,” she continued. “My message to you is the acknowledgment that life is so very fragile and that we can exercise complete control over certain things such as not drinking underage and if your are of age, to drink responsibly and don’t get behind the wheel of a car.”
Jewell paused for a moment and then added quietly, “As I walk out to my car [on Dec. 22], I will say a silent prayer that on Jan. 2 everyone who left [on Dec. 22] will return.”
Also in attendance at the event was Kevin Flynn, who is the school’s student assistance counselor. Flynn said the ADAPT students sign a contract promising not to use drugs or drink alcohol for the four years they are in high school.
“These students know that the message not to drink and drive and not to use drugs is important,” Flynn said. “And they show this every time they go into classrooms with younger children to teach them refusal skills.”
Eva Carella, coordinator of the municipal alliance, said, “Our message is getting out there, but we have to reach more people. Life is too precious and we will all learn to make healthy choices.”
Borough Councilman Robert Crawford, who serves as the governing body’s liaison to the school, and Councilman Jaye Sims were also present. Crawford read a proclamation from Mayor Michael Wilson proclaiming December as National Drunk and Drugged Driving Prevention Month and Dec. 19 as the fourth annual Holiday DWI-DUI Candlelight Vigil.
Also present was Freehold Regional High School District Board of Education member Bunny Hammer, who brought a message from the board reminding the teenagers of the fragility of life and noting that they are not invincible, although they may feel that way. She said the board members want all of “their” children to return to school after the holidays.
The Freehold High School Chamber Choir performed an emotional rendition of “Amazing Grace” under the direction of Pamela Makrancy, musical director.
Conner Spahn, 17, of Freehold Borough, Nicole Chaffer, 18, of Freehold Borough, and Rachel Sender, 16, of Manalapan, read poems which vividly portrayed the consequences of drunken driving.
Julia Malara, 17, of Marlboro, read the speech written by last year’s ADAPT coordinator student Stephanie Chiu. The piece related how lucky all of the teenagers who were present were to have their whole lives ahead of them.
“However, there are many who are not fortunate enough to open even one more holiday present or enjoy just one more meal with their families,” Julia read. “The candle that each of you are holding represents more than just a single life; collectively they stand for the thousands of people whose inner flame of life is blown out each year due to fatalities from drunk driving.”
Guests were asked to turn on their candles at this point.
“When you reflect on those lives, please know that the last lights these people see are the lights of the inner flame. The last lights they see are the lights of the emergency vehicles, fire trucks, police cars and ambulances,” Julia said, before asking for a moment of silence in honor of those who died a driving related death involving drugs or alcohol. “If you know of someone who died due to drunk driving, please blow out your candle as you witness the last lights those victims saw.”
At that point, bright red lights from a fire truck parked outside could be seen flashing and lighting up the now dimly lit room.
There was more than one moment of silence as people reflected as Julia had asked them to do — and more than one candle whose light was suddenly extinguished in that room.