Men and women become aware of domestic violence

Women Aware breakfast honors those who advocate for victims, serve the community

BY DEANNA McLAFFERTY Staff Writer

Prior to attending Women Aware’s second annual Moving Beyond Abuse Awards and Awareness Breakfast, honored guest Fran Newman shared tearful words with the organization’s executive director, Phyllis Adams: Newman told Adams that her daughter’s death will not be in vain.

Newman is the mother of Heather Newman Trapp, of Old Bridge, who died in a tragic murder-suicide at the hands of her estranged husband, Anthony Trapp, in December. The breakfast, held at Pines Manor in Edison on March 29, included a touching tribute to Trapp.

“She truly was a blessing. She lit up a room when she walked in,” Newman said. “On Dec. 15, the world lost a ray of sunshine. Heather is gone but will never be forgotten.”

Trapp will be remembered not only by her mother and two daughters, Emma and Sophia, but also by the more than 300 attendees of the Women Aware breakfast. The breakfast highlighted the organization’s advocacy for victims of domestic violence and service to women and families in Middlesex County. “Even in our grief, there is hope — hope for the next generation,” Adams said. “We are about saving lives. That’s our business.”

Women Aware has been in that business since 1979, and during Adams’ six years as executive director, it has become the first domestic violence agency in New Jersey to offer a permanent solution to homelessness for women and children leaving shelters to start a new life free of abuse.

The organization provides a variety of services, including a 24-hour hotline, emergency shelter for up to 10 families in a 24-bed house, counseling services, legal advocates, support groups and education. South Brunswick Councilman Joseph Camarota serves as president of the organization’s board of trustees and opened the ceremony.

“Your attendance sends a strong message that domestic violence has no place in our society,” he said. “But we have so much more to do, and we can’t do it alone. It is a job for all of us — women, men, families, schools and governments.”

Plenty of government officials joined attendees at the event, including Sen. Barbara Buono (D-18th District) and Joseph Vitale (D- 19th District), who presented a joint resolution in support of the organization’s mission. Vitale’s sister, Diane Palmer, serves as vice president of the Women Aware board of directors.

“This is an organization I respect so deeply,” Buono said. “Women have a right to live their lives free of fear, free of abuse and free of disrespect.”

This year’s event witnessed the unveiling of the first inaugural Blue Bra Society inductees. The Blue Bra Society was created after a young Egyptian woman was beaten and nearly stripped by the military during a protest in Tahrir Square in December. Under her abaya, she wore a blue bra.

The award recognizes those who stand up for victims of oppression or crime. Gina Plotino, of the Blue Bra Society, explained what the blue bra symbolizes for women everywhere.

“It says, ‘I may not have rights. I may have to cover up my body and face. I may be oppressed, but you cannot destroy my womanhood. You cannot take away my power,” Plotino said. “May the blue bra always give you the feeling of confidence and power.”

Inductees included Adams, Palmer and Buono as well as Julia McClure, Middlesex County first assistant prosecutor; Madeline Cook, executive director of the Edison Housing Authority; Ella Mae Mitchell, a member of the Women Aware board of directors; Ashlee Newman, a Syracuse University activist; Mildred Scott, Middlesex County sheriff; Sandra Soriano, a philanthropist; and Lisa Von Pier, director of the N.J. Department of Children and Families’ Division of Prevention and Community Partnerships.

According to Women Aware, one in every four women will be physically assaulted by a partner at some time, and domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 to 44. The violence accounts for more than 200,000 visits to U.S. emergency rooms every year and costs more than $5.8 billion each year. And every 21 days, a woman like Heather Trapp is killed by domestic violence.

“The effects of this go on and on,” Camarota said. “It can only be eradicated if we all recognize it.”

A second group was honored at the breakfast with the Moving Beyond Abuse Award for demonstrating a commitment to improving the lives of those affected by violence. Awardees included the New Jersey Housing and Mortgage Finance Agency for its support of WomenAware’s efforts to create permanent supportive housing for victims; the police departments of South River and Highland Park for their partnership in expanding access to services for underserved communities; and attorney Brian McFadden-DiNicola for his work in providing pro bono legal assistance to abuse victims.

In 2011, Women Aware sheltered 200 women and children at its “safe house,” provided 24,000 meals, assisted more than 1,000 clients with legal advocacy and court accompaniment, helped more than 250 people with counseling and therapy, served 2,024 teens through a dating abuse service, trained approximately 6,350 service providers and parents, and answered more than 5,000 hotline calls.

For more information about Women Aware, or to donate to the cause, visit www.womenaware.net. Contact Deanna McLafferty at

[email protected].