In Scooby scrubs, this new dad’s a role model
Pediatric nurse touches lives of patients, parents and
his own 10-week-old twins
By gloria stravelli
Staff Writer
Chris Kelly As a pediatric nurse, Peter Enge, of Old Bridge, brings perspective to his new role as dad to his 10-week-old twin son and daughter, Christopher and Mary Grace. Father’s Day will be a little less hectic for at least one pediatric nurse this year. Instead of spending the day caring for the young patients on the pediatric ward at Monmouth Medical Center in Long Branch, Peter Enge will be at home trying out a new role as the father of 10-week-old twins.
"Father’s Day will be a little different for me this year. I’ll spend it with just two children instead of 15," said Enge, an Old Bridge resident and the medical center’s only male pediatric nurse.
Known to his young patients as "Pete," Enge works hard to dispel the scariness of being ill and being in a hospital setting.
"They’re afraid," he said. "You try to build a rapport with them."
For the younger ones, "Pete’s" scrubs help break the ice.
"I wear my Scooby-Doo scrubs," he explained, "because everyone loves Scooby."
A certified pediatric nurse and a registered nurse, Enge set out to become a physical therapist but slots in college programs were scarce so he took the advice of a counselor and opted for nursing instead.
"My instructor was pleased I was going into nursing. She felt I could be a role model and demonstrate that nursing is not just for women," he said.
And that’s exactly how it has worked out, he explained.
"When I first started working, kids would say, ‘Oh, you’re the doctor.’ I would say, ‘No, I’m the nurse. But the doctor that was here was a girl, and she’s a doctor,’ and they seemed to understand that."
It wasn’t long before Enge got feedback from his patients.
Asked if he wanted to be a doctor when he grew up, one of his patients answered, "No, I want to be a nurse like Pete."
Pediatrics was his final rotation in the nursing program at Staten Island (N.Y.) University Hospital, and at that point Enge knew it would be his focus.
"I felt comfortable and my instructor was extremely supportive," he said. "She was very excited to see a male nurse going into pediatrics. Most go into intensive care or the emergency room. There were only three male nurses in my class, and I was the only one going into pediatrics."
Being a part of a large, close-knit family encouraged him to focus on pediatrics, he said.
"I enjoyed spending time with my five nieces and nephews," Enge said. "I could already change a diaper when I was a young."
After two and a half years at Staten Island University Hospital, Enge moved to New Jersey and joined the staff at Monmouth Medical Center in Long Branch in 1999.
Enge spends his three days per week, 12-hour shift caring for children ages 2 weeks to 21 years with a wide range of ailments ranging from tonsillitis to cancer.
His patient load in the pediatric ward is generally four to five children at a time, but that can change dramatically, Enge noted.
"We can have as many as 10 per day because kids get sick and get well so quickly," he explained. "There are times we have five kids on the floor, and there are times we have 20. It fluctuates so quickly. It’s a real challenge sometimes."
Taking vital signs, assessing patients, administering medications are functions that fill only part of his time; the rest is spent providing emotional support for his patients and their parents.
He tries to give his young patients what they most need — a sense of comfort.
"Most kids can only get that from their parents," he acknowledged. "For those whose parents can’t stay with them, you try to be a surrogate parent to them, to hold them when they need it.
"You try and make it less traumatic. You try to get to their level and try to explain it in a way they can understand."
For preteen and adolescent patients, he gives tips on being an ace at computer games.
"I have my own PlayStation so I can talk to the older ones about games," he said.
With infants, it’s more a matter of dealing with parents, a role Enge took on only a few weeks ago.
Parents, Enge said, need support and information.
"That’s the biggest thing we have to deal with," he explained. "Doctors discuss their child’s condition with them, and we try to give them as much information as we can so they understand what’s going on and why we’re doing what we’re doing.
"Sometimes we need to educate them," he continued, "to teach them how to administer medications, how to do dressing changes. We discuss development issues with them, safety issues."
Enge said his gender is a definite advantage in dealing with the fathers of his patients.
"With some dads, being a male nurse does away with a barrier to communication," he explained. "You have a common bond with some dads, so they don’t have to hold back their feelings. They tend to be more comfortable, not to be afraid to say something."
The birth of twins Christopher and Mary Grace to Enge and his wife, Ann Marie, almost 10 weeks ago gave him the opportunity to reverse roles. Born at 36 weeks, his daughter experienced respiratory problems and required care in the hospital’s neonatal unit.
"Their birth gave me a newfound appreciation for what parents are feeling when they have a child in the hospital," he said. "I was very appreciative of the nurses. I really saw how they interact with parents. Just the interaction was really reassuring. They’d tell us how she was doing. It was a good feeling."
A diaper-changing pro, Enge also teaches Baby Care Basics, a class for expectant parents, who don’t seem surprised to find a man demonstrating baby-bathing techniques, he observed.
Although people see dealing with sick children as depressing, Enge said the fact is most pediatric patients tend to recover quickly.
"A lot of people say, ‘It must be difficult for you.’ Yes, it’s hard to hear a baby cry, but children are so resilient. It’s fulfilling to see them get better and a lot of them get better rather quickly," he said.
But there are long-term patients, as well as some who don’t recover.
"You build a special relationship with some of your oncology kids," he said. "We have a 16-year-old patient who’s one of my favorite kids. He’s got a devastating disease, but he’s just a normal, everyday kid. It’s nice to see that.
"I’m a surrogate dad, brother to some," Enge added, "especially young abuse victims or children who are taken out of their homes. Sometimes they stay for a while and we buy them clothes.
"The most difficult thing is when we lose a child," Enge said. "We take care of them, so we’re family. Especially the long-term patients, you really have a special relationship, and it can be pretty hard to take."
In fact, Enge’s entry took first place in Monmouth Medical Center’s 2003 Nurses’ Week Essay Contest
In "Nursing: A Touching Profession," he confided that his fondest memory as a nurse was actually his worst day at work. Enge told of standing by the bedside as a child passed on and of helping the mother as she held her child for the last time.
"The fact that just my presence would help her … meant the world to me," he wrote. "We … shed some tears and reminisced on the many ways this child had touched both our lives and the funny and sad moments we shared with her. This experience showed me how lucky I am to be able to touch the lives of others and made me realize how much they touch mine."
But his young patients supply the antidote for times like those, Enge said, by interjecting the much needed sound of laughter into the pediatric ward.
"They give me laughter, just the opportunity to be light-hearted," he said. "There can be a lot of laughter. For instance, one of the kids got his hands on a water gun and whenever someone walked in, he squirted them."
And there was the 3-year-old who bellowed for Enge from another room.
"I was taking care of another patient and he screamed, ‘Hey, Pete, I’m beeping in here. Where are you?’ I just broke up."