REALITY CHECK, Feb. 25
By: Dawn Cariello
It’s been stated, although probably not by a politician, that politics is show business for ugly people. So what better time than the Oscars the High Holy Day of Hollywood to acknowledge the noteworthy performances of some public officials over the past year?
And the nominees are:
Million Dollar Baby This melodrama stars multi-millionaire Doug Forrester, who is self-funding his gubernatorial campaign, yet whines that the probable Democratic nominee, multi-millionaire Jon Corzine, is buying the governor’s office.
I, Robot Based on a true story, John Kerry stars as a machine-like candidate who is unable to connect with voters.
House of Flying Daggers Tom DeLay leads this ensemble cast of GOP House leaders who will stop at nothing to solidify their majority, silence Democrats and keep errant party members in line.
A Series of Unfortunate Events From a scandal-plagued administration to an extramarital affair, this black comedy traces the governorship of Jim McGreevey.
A Very Long Engagement A cliché-ridden saga in which Donald Rumsfeld once again refuses to provide a timetable for withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq.
Bad Education Science fiction meets the supernatural as elected school board officials in Pennsylvania and Georgia attempt to alter the teaching of evolution.
The Day After Tomorrow This disaster epic features the entire New Jersey Legislature as it continues to put off addressing the state’s horrific property taxes.
Dodgeball: An Underdog Story A screwball comedy starring members of the Democratic National Committee, who blame everyone but themselves for the party’s presidential election defeat.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind A fantasy in which members of the Bush administration try to erase the past by claiming that bringing democracy to Iraq was the main reason for going to war and that everything is going according to plan.
Kill Bill A farcical romp featuring four Democratic state senators and their 18 Republican counterparts who snatch a long-awaited pay-to-play reform bill from the jaws of victory by refusing to vote on the measure.
What the Bleep Do We Know? A whodunit in which leaders of the military, Justice Department and Department of Defense all claim ignorance about the orders and memos that led to the torture scandal at Abu Gharib.
Mean Girls Two tour-de-force performances dominate this dialogue-driven drama as Sen. Barbara Boxer and Condoleezza Rice trade barbs at Ms. Rice’s Senate confirmation hearing.
The Time of the Wolf The confusing plot follows immune-from-accountability Iraqi War architect Paul Wolfowitz as he sets his sights on Iran. (In Farsi with English subtitles.)
Shark Tale A fable in which George W. Bush singles out trial lawyers as the sole source of exorbitant health-care costs.
She Hate Me A sharp-tongued Lynn Cheney in an over-the-top performance as she verbally eviscerates John Kerry for mentioning her gay daughter in a presidential debate.
Vanity Fair A remake of the 2000 story of Ralph Nader and his quest to be a presidential spoiler. The ending of the 2004 version differs from the original when the protagonist fails in his efforts to generate support.
Jersey Girl Adapted from the book, "It’s My Party Too," loyal-to-a-fault heroine Christie Todd Whitman laments the social conservative influence of the Republican Party yet refuses to acknowledge that George W. Bush is greatly responsible for the severe turn to the right.
Unlike the Oscars, there is no winner among these nominees. Maybe the current year will offer performances from public servants that inspire us with their honesty, civility, integrity and nonpartisanship. Nah, that kind of stuff only happens in the movies.