‘Do Not Call’ seems to mean go ahead and call at will

CODA

GREG BEAN

If you need to know exactly how terrified telemarketers are of the toothless federal Do Not Call Registry, all you have to do is look at the registry’s website, on which you’ll find this warning: “Scammers have been making phone calls claiming to represent the National Do Not Call Registry. The calls claim to provide an opportunity to sign up for the registry. These calls are not coming from the registry or the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), and you should not respond to these calls.” In other words, the Do Not Call police — so far — haven’t even been able to track down and stop the lawbreakers pretending to be them.

Considering the low regard with which many fraudulent telemarketing firms hold the national regulatory agency tasked with enforcing infractions of the Do Not Call Registry enacted in 2004 — and to which more than 206 million Americans have added their names and numbers — is it any wonder that those of us with landlines are still being bombarded with illegal, unsolicited marketing calls?

At our house (we’ve been on the Do Not Call list since its inception), for example, we’ve gotten 23 calls from telemarketers at all hours of the day in just the last week. Because we have caller ID, I usually ignore calls from numbers I don’t recognize, but lately I’ve been answering and following up.

Sometimes, that’s impossible because there’s nobody on the line when you answer the phone, and if you call the number where the call ostensibly originated (let’s say 978- 397-2914), you get a recorded message saying that the subscriber you have dialed is not in service, or that the number (971-208-9936) is unallocated, whatever that means.

Sometimes, even if redial connects you to some entity on the other end of the line, it’s impossible to determine who the caller was, or what they may have wanted. Somebody whose number showed up as 417-800-2296 called three times during the day on Feb. 23. When I called it back, it was answered by a recorded voice — which did not identify the name of the company or organization placing the call — that offered me two options. I could press 1 if I wanted to be connected to a customer service representative, or press 2 if I wanted to request that they refrain from calling me in the future. The FTC says pressing either button won’t work, and will only lead to more robocalls, because the caller will have learned that you are willing to answer your phone.

Sometimes, though, there is a person on the line when you answer, and many of these calls seem to fall into one of two categories. One is from groups claiming to be able to lower your energy bills, and the other is from groups offering to help you lower the interest rate on your credit cards. With both types of calls, I’ve told the caller that I’ll stay on the line if they’ll identify the company they represent and tell me where it’s located, and they always disconnect the call at that point.

Both of these approaches are potential scams that could wind up costing you big money. The people claiming to be able to lower your energy bills, for example, could simply be fishing for personal information like your Social Security number, or they might provide you with a fake bank routing number so they can steal your money when you pay your bill. In New Jersey, there are many legitimate third-party electric energy suppliers, thanks to deregulation that allows consumers to choose which company supplies them with electric power at a savings, but even so, you should never give out personal information on the phone to a cold caller.

The credit card interest rate scam has been around for years and works something like this: The company charges as much as $2,000 in upfront fees to negotiate lower interest rates with your credit card companies. They never do, and they never give the money back. They might send you a brochure giving you instructions about how to pay down your credit card debts early, or they might help you obtain a new credit card that has a temporary zero percent interest rate, but they never live up to their promise to refund your upfront money if you aren’t satisfied. Over the years, the FTC has forced several of these deceptive companies out of business, but new ones spring up as fast as others are shut down.

So what can we do? I guess we could file more complaints with the Do Not Call Registry and the FTC, but that is a frustrating and ineffective process. In order to file a complaint, you must provide the number of the offending caller, and the name of the company they represent, which, as I’ve noted, is often impossible. And even if you have all of that information, the chance that the feds will take action is minimal. The registry does not promise to follow up on every complaint, only that it will investigate if enough complaints come in about the same number. Compared to the number of flagrant violators, the number of successful prosecutions by the registry and the FTC since its inception has been laughably small. If it were otherwise, violators would not feel so safe in flouting the law, even to the point of pretending to be the Do Not Call Registry or the FTC, as I noted at the beginning of this column.

We could start thinking outside the box. Next time one of those questionable numbers pops up on your caller ID, and you find a human on the other end, you could say, “Mujhae akela chore do!” In Urdu, that means, “Leave me alone!” (Other helpful Urdu phrases: “Kya ap ise ahistah keh sakte hain?” — Can you speak more slowly?; “Main samjha nahin” — I don’t understand; and “Eh sahiba sab chizon ke paise dain gi” — The lady will pay for everything.)

Or we could contact our U.S. senators and representatives and state attorney general, and find out what they’re doing to solve the problem. That’s probably the best alternative. I’ll let you know what I find out.

Gregory Bean is the former executive editor of Greater Media Newspapers. You can reach him at [email protected].